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This is so helpful for a new unschooling mom here! So excited for this journey

I feel so strongly to do unschooling...letting go of fears that people project on me and focusing on knowing my kids and creating a strong bond with them ❤

Love this!!

My child is trying to learn skateboarding tricks and is getting quite frustrated. I feel alittle uncomfortable about bx I want to help but not sure how. I guess I'll start by watching some skateboarding videos ❤

Furthermore, in University we are still forced to learn and pay to learn things that are not part of our majors. I hope they do away with that in such a way that people can start earning masters degrees within the 2 or 4 years after high-school

Very helpful, thank you ladies!❤

I’m having trouble finding social opportunities for my daughter. Creating them didn’t work in the form of clubs,we don’t go to church, classes,coops…etc. this is a huge hurdle that wasn’t there when she was younger but is at age 13. We live in a semi rural situation as well. Her siblings are older and grown now. Please help.

Thank you , Pam! Greetings from Romania :)

😂 I love talking about the menstrual cycle, too! It's nice to hear someone else mention that as an intriguing topic of conversation

I love the idea of unschooling. I don't love the idea of my kids not knowing math or how to read by the time they're 18. Is there a balance? And to be fair, i'm talking about special needs kids who may not "accidentally" learn to read or who may always hate math.

So what if we do know what they are on for hours at a time and it's things like ASMR videos watching people tap on things that just seems like wasted time and dumbing kids down

I started homeschooling my 12 yo this year. I wish I had been given this opportunity as a child. I feel like my life was postponed by conventional education. my heart hurts for the children who will grow up believing they are bad or dumb when in truth they are just in an environment that does not favor their genius

My youngest child wants so many things lol to ride go karts , to have guinea pig business , horse lessons and more ...I get overwhelmed but I try to stay open to possibilities ..I have 3 kids so just trying to juggle ❤ I love this podcast

I think consent (or lack thereof) was the final straw/reason for choosing unschooling and not just home-schooling... someone astutely compared conventional schooling to a prison sentence with the same lack of consent in most of the activities. That blew my mind and I realized why I always thought it's the school system itself that's problematic not just specific schools or type of schools.

What i notice is just how much the indepenðence rhetoric is fueled by fears of what if's ...thank you guys for always bringing a sense of connection and peace to it all

Thank you so much for this. Had a few aha moments - I have been unschooling a long time now, and only my eldest ever attended school briefly, and that was after a spell of unschooling, and my younger four have never been to school. Yet after all this time, and despite being thoroughly invested in the journey, I still have some deschooling to do myself. I still carry beliefs or concerns I thought I had left behind long ago - and I definitely need to start giving myself permission to act more like my kids do! I am a homemaker and full time with my kids, obviously, and I realise that I constantly equate my own worth to how much I “get done”, in a culture of “get it all done”…. Which is terrible for building relationships according to their own schedule and in an unhurried way, yet that is the whole point. I struggle with constant chores etc and am always putting off reading that book or doing that project as I first need to “get the work done”. I can see how much I need to address this, for the good of my whole family, and it is something for me to work on in earnest! Love and light 💖

We had a traumatic move where i had abruptly leave the house with my kids . It felt awful because it was where my kids grew up and they had to leave their bestvfriends behind. Although i helped them to continuecto visit their friend, it was not thecsame. They left all their things behind with no choice in the matter and i do feel sad about that. ❤

I apprecitae your videos, thanks for sharing!

Thank you all for doing this show and bringing these points to light for folks who are not happy with the Public education system and are looking at homeschooling. I hope this helps families find the confidence to take the step out of the system.

I really love and appreciate your videos ❤

Thank you! 🙏🏻🩷

Love the carpenter and gardener reference ❤

All the activities mentioned sound pretty spectacular to me 😂 i totally get feeling like u need to things that sound impressive to others. I have to be careful not to compare myself to other unschooling moms as well

I moved out at 18 and got married at 19 to my hubby (married almost 18 years now 🎉) but our oldest who is about to be 13 says she wants to live with us forever lol I’m happy to keep my kids home as long as they need I personally needed to leave I was more than ready

I am only six minutes in and I love this conversation. My example is my daughter who is 14. She took two years of piano lessons with a teacher...and loves piano. However, she no longer practices as she should per her teacher. My daughter wasn't sure if she wanted to continue. I gave her permission to quit. She still struggled with the decision on whether to continue on or not. It was when I said...you are just taking a break. It doesn't have to be permanent. You can always get back into piano when you are ready. This is just a break. That wording...Break...was exactly what she needed to hear. That it's not quitting. She decided to take the break and is so much happier now.

I love this channel. Lately, I've been resonating with sitting back and observing my child rather than stepping in in any sort of way (unless they are emotionally at their witts end or come to me for help). There have been many aha moments that everything they do is practice. I reeeaally don't want to barge in to correct them when they're feeling it in their body and will continue to adjust as they grow. It was an aha moment when I heard you talk about the child naturally learning to eat and walk. I'm there, supportive, encouraging, but I'd never say, "No! Don't step your foot down like that. Set it down like this!" So it makes sense to continue to trust them. My 3 year old is medically complex. Hearing you talk about building the relationship so when you've got to do things they don't want to do (scheduled meds/water, pokes and prods, way more) they trust that they're heard and they trust you as a parent. I often wonder how to help my child learn consent over their body when they need so much medical intervention. I'm really starting to feel that living an unschooling life can give them the opportunity to live their best life.

The whole “equality” conversation is a big big bear of mine and I am so grateful you explored it here. Nobody is equal! I get a lot of hate for that! We are all different and require different things. Understanding that is the only way to be just and fair. My eighteen month old needs totally different things to my fifteen year old - to treat them equally would be wholly unfair. It’s the same socially - and one of the reasons I hate rules. Rules are about equality, not fairness. I could go on! We are equivalent, not equal. We make different choices and have different needs - but these are equivalently valuable. Thank you for another supportive and thought provoking conversation. Much love.

Hey Pam! Can you point me to any of your videos or links that talk about handling hygiene with your child ? Thanks

I love the light you bring to the idea that equality doesnt necessarily equate to fairness. Although the intent for people using this idea of equality is for the intention of trying to be fair.

Yes another milestone where societys conditioning is strong. These videos are great anchors to help us when those seasons come

Im glad she addressed the topic of young adults and drugs. I was wondering if there was anyone out there who unschooled and experienced their young adult become drug addicts (although i know that did not happen with the interviewee)

Great interview. I did forced learning to read with my first 2 and my 3rd whonis 8 resists the forced reading like no other. Thankfully now I am learning about unschooling and knowing that my child can abd will know how to read without being forced

I thought feeling fear when things were going "good" was just me lol 😂it's an actual thing ..I definitely dont want that belief anymore bc it doesn't serve me❤

Homeschoolong/unschooling is such a gift ❤

This conversation is one I feel most parents can talk about forever. There are ao many personal preferences when it comes to sleeping, that's for certain. Ive always been a person that has to have 8 hours to function and 10 optimally, then along came my son who is about to turn 10. Once he is asleep he sleeps so good but I can count the number of times he has just ever passed out on one hand! Anyways, in regards to either a comment I read or someone saying, "it's not like anyone is trying to stay awake all night...". We just experienced this a couple of days this week and he did do it because he could and to see how things would play out after 😂 Love the podcast and the unschooling camaraderie here! Would love to here your experience with people who only try to relate to your kid by having them perform or offer up social experiences with public school students, books to read, all things "school" related that feels very stifling and non-accepting of unschool/homeschool as an alternative lifestyle.

Finding community has been a sore thumb for me haha we participate in library things ect But finding a community has been challenging

Food is such a fraught and emotive issue isn’t it. Like everything with unschooling - it’s a learning curve of relational and relationship integrity. Full disclosure - for various reasons early on in motherhood I became very interested in nutrition and then, through this lifelong process of unschooling myself (!), I have become pretty deeply informed about many angles of nutrition including lots of theories round the various fad diets out there and so on…. I know a lot. I have a big supplement cupboard and a handle on the finer points of micronutient intakes… This is for context. I care deeply about nutrition and am personally a bit of a “health nut” around food….. so I am definitely that Mum who people might assume would be “my kids are going to grow up ripping raw kale from my kitchen garden and nibbling it and we will make raw clean energy balls together and tofu scramble…. There will be no packets or junk and I will make sure they understand how important ‘healthy’ eating is….” But am I that mum? No!! There’s plenty ice cream for breakfast in my house but you know what? That’s cool. I bought the ice cream and put it there, and they have joyful mornings. Recently my autistic teenager whose food journey has been extremely rocky and peppered with lots of less than conventionally “optimal” food preferences, and whose preferences have usually been what we’d call exceedingly restrictive - she said to me “Mum, I think the way you have been with us with food means we will all be interested in making healthy food when we are older, because you haven’t been hung up about it, and have let us try everything, and never judged. But you provide healthy foods too.” I was blown away. I just busk it - but I have never ever understood or been ok with the concept of forcing anyone to eat anything - that’s plain torture - and suggesting people should eat on a schedule or finish something they hate to eat something they like makes zero sense at all to me. Or telling someone what they should like! I get a lot of criticism from those who believe “making several different meals is making a rod for my own back”, and ‘they’ll never learn’” and so on, but I ignore it. sometimes I do feel a bit defeated by a sea of crisp packets where my heart wants to see fruit peels, home made crumbs and kale stalks (!), BUT my kids are free explorers, as always, and whilst my methods are extremely imperfect, I hope they will generally learn to trust their bodies and wisdom, and to both fuel from and get appropriate joy from food. My youngest baby nearly starved to death at a few weeks old due to a medical need that was going unseen - nothing like that for helping one understand the value of following cues for feeding - at every life stage. As always, don’t underestimate your children - they are graciously primed for life - just offer your love and support and something unexpectedly beautiful will grow. My pitfall is probably finances - meaning we aren’t well off, and so once a child likes a certain food a lot, I am guilty of providing it AND then not providing other alternatives for them to try when they might be open to it, as I don’t want the waste and expense….. so I inadvertently cement what might be passing preferences or passing aversions. This I need to find energy for and continue with creative solutions. Anyway - they all five have a positive relationship with food, and all five like totally different things. We don’t have mealtimes - we often eat together but there’s no pressure. I had food issues in my teens, and I’m happy I have generally avoided passing these on.

We are definitely scared as being judged by the world as bad parents ..fear just robs us

Thank you so much!🤍

I wonder how old your daughter was with the candy?i konda fell of the unschooling boat because i reontroduced forced leanring with reading for my 8 year old and forced math with my 10 year old lol i felt like they needed my regulation 😂❤❤

What a wonderful project. I have 4 boys, ages: 6, 4, 2 and 5months. And I don't want to force them with my anxious pride. These young people sound very stable and lovely 😊❤

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Thank you so much for the work you do! ❤

Yes this is so encouraging enlightening. I look how others homeschool and unschooing is far the best for my kids and family. This is my 5th year and I cannot do the traditional way to homeschool.

My son didn't learn the alphbet until 5.5 . I was so worried about it and tried everything. Then i let go and turned to unschool. He just did it. Now with reading same thing. He's almost 7. He knows all the letter sounds and understands that's how you reas but no interest. He doesn't see the need. He plays video games and can't read them so we're hoping this will connect the dots.

I love this idea of consent based relationships with our children . I think that parents being afraid of the state, meeting requirements and having a paper trail of "proof" that one is "schooling " can be a barrier to experiencing the freedom and wonder of unschooling. I think it can be tempting to operate out of this fear.

I am curious about their journeys in learning how to read

I think people feel rushed to teah their kids because of fear. Fear of experiences like the ones she mentioned with grandparents and the state. But her mom overcame and thats so awesome

I love to see someone not afraid to live authebtically